It is seven days since my first time meditating. I am attempting to make this a weekly routine. I toyed with the idea of trying to meditate every day, but I felt that was too much of a commitment as I am just starting out. Once a week is probably more realistic for me.
I am in the same circumstances as last week. My fiancée is at work and it is just the cats and I.
I woke up a little later than last time, so unfortunately there were some maintenance workers right outside our apartment. They are painting the outside of the building.
It’s hard for me to ignore the sound of their equipment and their conversations themselves. After a few minutes of unsuccessfully getting in the meditative mood, I take a little break and decide to play some video games with some friends online. After about an hour, I tell my friends I got to go and I head back to the bedroom. The maintenance workers are no longer there, and they have moved to the other side of the building.
I sit Indian style on my bed and close my eyes. The cats are hanging out in the room also, making just enough noise to distract me. I do my best to ignore them and focus on my breathing. For some reason it is a lot harder to concentrate this week. I can’t seem to be able to get in the same Zen as my first time meditating.
I catch myself opening my eyes every so often to either look at the clock or check out what the cats are doing. It’s not as easy this time to “be mindful,” as the saying goes. Many minutes go by as I keep my eyes closed, but my thoughts are keeping me from meditating.
To make things worse, I cannot get into a comfortable position. I am fidgeting, and at one point I changed positions every several seconds. Last week I got in a good position right away and it was not a problem. This time, however, it is a different story. After a few more minutes, I finally get into a semi-comfortable position.
Again, I close my eyes and attempt to focus on my breathing. Keyword is attempt. I definitely am not making any progress. Finally, after about twenty minutes I give up. I get up and make some coffee. It seems I have taken a step back from last week. I guess it is time for me to do a little more research into meditating, and not just trying to wing it.
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